Spiritual Shaming, Self-Worth and Why Suffering Isn’t the Way You Need To Go …
We are all, Children of the Universe. We come into being bearing so many Gifts and so much Love. We all have so much to Give.
The sad part is when we forget that we are a part of the Collective. That we too, deserve the love, nurture, support and abundance that we so freely and willingly give to others.
The sad part is when we deny ourselves the same flow of energy we seek to open for others. Some locate it within a rhetoric that says ‘if you suffer, you are sacred’.
A lot of spiritual growth happens when you truly sit and feel into that question. Yes, suffering, feeling wounds, scars, trauma – can be an incredibly rewarding process. But why is being in pain any less sacred than being happy and fulfilled?
The political scientist in me says that’s an awfully convenient idea to tell a population unhappy with the way they lives are panning out. It makes for a great captive population.
‘What, your life isn’t great? Taxes are too high? The Plague? What, you want reforms? Err…Uhm… — Well… that’s just God’s way, and my, aren’t you blessed to suffer so … What do you mean why? Well, you’ve sinned!!!! (and depending on your perspective, that’s this life or lives past, or simply for having been born human and wanting to pro-create)’
The priestess in me looks at it as as a well-meaning but outdated adherence to a old paradigm that, frankly, does not hold water in the present (unless you really really want it to – and if you do, be aware that it is your choice).
And a lot of that goes back to what I’ve been writing recently on the wounded healer / woundology paradigm. There’s a very big difference between taking the time you need to work through it, and between self-sabotaging your healing process because (1) you don’t believe you can heal (2) you don’t believe you deserve to (3) the Ego says it’s holy to suffer, or (4) that you’ve sinned so badly you deserve to fry for the remainder of your existence/s
Now – this whole dialogue on sinning / attachment to woundedness / refusal to see yourself as deserving better – deserves its own book. I’m going to move onto a different aspect of the question.
Another reason (especially) healers who provide services to others have issues with healing / nurturing themselves is because of the ‘God will provide’ argument.
Let’s break that down shall we.
I recall a few weeks ago (and I’ve seen it a few times) an individual who was very upset with me charging for my services and going on my travels (it’s how I do my thing). He was so so so agitated and kept telling me how I needed to repent as God would provide me with I needed.
Truth be told, yes, God/Goddess has absolutely provided. I have a skillset which I can use, and people willing to honor the work I facilitate. I make sure that I can give back what I receive, not just through paid sessions. I actually do quite a bit of pro bono work, and donate when I can.
Plus – Spirit is the one that decides when, how much and how I do what I do. So, as I tend to say, ‘If you don’t like it, take it up with the Boss. I’m sure Ma-Kali can squeeze you in for an appointment 😉 ‘
Without much surprise, I find I never get this kind of judgment from polytheists – most cultures that believed in more than one form of deity has, inevitably, some form of being that celebrated Abundance, Prosperity, Success and Wealth.
The only ‘sin’ that I see happening is when a person gives only to receive, does not honor the balance of exchange of energy or measures their worth only in terms of dollars/currency made.
Plus, if we think about it – even within the paradigm of ‘God provides’, who is to say that flow of energy does not come through money?
Plus – if we were to hold to a very strict interpretation of that argument – by that same logic, no one would need any help from any human at all.
That’s not the paradigm we currently live in, so .. I’m not buying that argument so much. It uses the name of the Divine, but shames those who give into a place where they cannot receive.
If Ascended Beings still emoted the way most humans do, I’m sure that they’ve *facepalmed* quite a bit over the past few centuries.
So in summary:
Yes, you’ve got gifts to give.
Yes, you’ve got the right to be happy.
Yes, you’ve got the right to reap the rewards of your work.
No, you are not a sinner for wanting to do so.
No, you are not a sinner for wanting to not suffer.
No, you are not any less sacred for wanting to make sure your needs are met.
We have been conditioned to think this way. And it is time to lift those shackles.
Step away from anyone who has to shame you into becoming ‘spiritual’.
We’re moving into a New Paradigm, people.
Plus, we’re eventually moving into a global economy that has got to run in different ways. Once we deal with our collective issues surrounding money / energy exchange / women / the sacral chakra (all linked to the same vibration) .. I think this discussion will be completely obsolete.
Hope that happens sooner, rather than later x
Ciao for now!
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Image: W44 Supernova Remnant by By NASA/DOE/Fermi LAT Collaboration, NRAO/AUI, JPL-Caltech, ROSAT [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons. Digitally Altered by Bairavee Balasubramaniam (08 December 2015).