I´VE ONLY JUST BEGUN …. (a.k.a. Why Trying to Sexually Shame a Powerful, Vocal, Spiritual Woman is a Bad Idea)

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In my community, girls are warned against putting their faces and names up on Facebook. Because they have been conditioned to think that someone will use their personal information or distort their images as a highly toxic form of sexualized ridicule – to shame her or even to blackmail her.

And if that happens, it´s automatically her fault – for who asked her to show her face in a public domain? How dare she? All over the world, we see this levied against women who occupy a public space. Especially if they are seen as powerful, threatening-to-the-status-quo and confident.

It´s always a political statement, and very rarely linked to the woman or girl herself-as-a-being. And if the woman herself is a public or political figure – doubly so. It´s never about who she is, but what she represents.

We are still conditioned to associate shame with female sexuality and so that is why it is still used as a weapon. We are still conditioned to be silent (for a variety of reasons) when things like this happen.

And really, we shouldn´t be.

For those of you who aren´t familiar with the context – over the past 3 weeks, I have been subjected to continuous sexual and emotional harassment. It´s not just silly commentary on Facebook, but people who have watched my physical movements, have made physical threats and tried to lure me to meet them in person – and now – most recently – have begun to post nude photographs of random women claiming that it´s me – especially on posts where I talk about my social work and of family.

In my case, my would-be-attackers are not just going after me as a person, but what I represent to my community. Not only are they trying to shame me sexually – which personally I don´t feel so much about because it´s .. ludicrous – but the´re trying to re-write the legacy that my father and I have been building. Now that …. brings out my trident.

My father single-handedly inspired an entire generation. He was (and still is) a pioneer and path-maker in so many different ways. Thousands of families were touched by his single-minded focus to the empowerment of a politically, socially and economically marginalized community. Wherever we go, someone comes up to my father and thanks him for the awareness he brought to the people and the many lives he changed.

And I am his daughter. Whilst I don´t claim to have done anything on that scale (so far, at least), my contribution to my society has been through my accelerated academic achievements, lecturing to kids and their parents on ways to understand the brain and help their kids do what I did, in my PhD (when, how, why it was done) and now – in the spiritual and vocal path I am making for myself. And believe me, it is public.

What I notice about these people is that they´re specifically trying to re-write my biography and dismissing anything and everything we have done to distort it into the worst thing they can imagine. And I´m certainly not the first woman to go through it, nor shall I (by any stretch of the imagination) be the last.

All of this comes at a time where I am raising powerful social critiques and that I can safely say no one has dared to raise.This attack came just as I was heading for a televised Tamil-language debate watched by millions – in which I did exactly just that.

So how do I handle it?

(1) I know it´s not personal, in the usual sense of the term. I lick my wounds where I have to and get going. And you will see the occasional rant.

(2) I am working on compassion, release and forgiveness. Whatever this dynamic is, it´s playing out for a reason that is bigger than the personal-Self. Part of that involves Faith.

(3) I seek justice. Not as revenge, but as justice. At a personal level, I can´t afford to get caught up in the toxicity of this energy. At a more meta space, that´s exactly what I have to do. Forgiving someone does not mean that they stop being accountable for what they did. It means that you are no longer emotionally hooked in a toxic way.

My life is seen by many in my community – whether I know them or not personally. And for better or worse, it shows a path. What I do counts. That applies to us all, in my case it´s a little more hypervisible.

I used to think it came down to petty jealousy (which at the personal level – is probably what motivates those who seek to blame,shame and distort the images of public, powerful, political women). And then my eyes opened to the bigger picture.

It´s really not about me as a person. And it´s not about them as people either. But something much larger.

It´s coming from the work that I´m doing. Which is still the Law of Attraction, but in a more sophisticated way than the usual – it´s your negativity and drama reflected back at you. Which is the New-Age equivalent of absolving the need for action and redirecting blame.

I have absolutely no regrets in what I have done and will do, nor would I backtrack.

When someone stands in their power and speaks the uncomfortable truth, their energetic field changes. On the one hand, for some, they become a focal point of inspiration – and for others – they become a target.

When these kinds of attacks happen, the target gets blamed and ridiculed – especially when her work in the world pushes through a certain threshold of awareness.

But that is – still – a part of the work. Not something to borne, swept under the carpet or ignored. But energy to transmute through conscious, public engagement.

And in my case, that means communicating a very clear message to my attackers – and the larger energetic dynamics these puppets are dancing to the tune to.

And that message is simple.

I´ve only just begun my dance,
On this world as a stage,
And in many others.
As the eyes burn with Soul´s song,
And the feet trample what must be no longer be borne,
So too shall the stars, one day, whisper my name.

In other words – Get out of my way, whilst you still can.
I´ve only just begun.

Priestess Bairavee Balasubramaniam PhD
The Sky Priestess

** Clarification on title. Sexually shaming, putting down or trying to berate anyone is a bad idea. Trying to do so to a woman who can fight back is even worse (for the energy that tries, that is).

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15 thoughts on “I´VE ONLY JUST BEGUN …. (a.k.a. Why Trying to Sexually Shame a Powerful, Vocal, Spiritual Woman is a Bad Idea)

  1. Bairavee, I just don’t comprehend those who have this kind of hatred and fear. I see it all the time in this world. As do many others. I pray this all works out the best it can for you. And the attackers. The epiphany of understanding is in our souls, not necessarily the human mind.
    Warmth to you,
    E. Stevenson

    Like

  2. I am inspired by your story, the work of you and your family in bringing to life and showing the way to the possibilities of the incredible value and beautiful power of your people and even of women themselves through the creation and nurturing of who you are.

    I am from the Christian tradition, and I urge you to consider the whole armor of God, (who l believe can be referenced as that which is of perfect Love in the Universe Unbound.) For, you and your family surely can and have been his Voice and his Hands in this world.

    Here is the instructional scripture that l am referencing. (Though l know you are strong in this area (in order to hand you a ready weapon against this challenge) l went ahead and tried to illuminate what l can understand about how this Word might help you.)

    Ephesians 6: 10-18
    (Description of your work ) For (your) struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world (that referenced above) and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms..

    Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil (your current situation) comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then

    (Here l highlighted the points at which you must meditate on from the standpoint of your full mission on this earth) with the belt of TRUTH buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of RIGHTIOUSNESS in place, and with your feet fitted with the READINESS that comes from the GOSPEL (truth) of PEACE. In addition to all this, take up the shield of FAITH, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of SALVATION and the sword of the SPIRIT, which is the WORD of GOD.  

    18 And pray in the Spirit on ALL occasions with ALL kinds of prayers and requests .  this in mind, be ALERT and always keep on praying for all the Lord (LOVE)’s people (especially those who you and your family have been charged with sheparding (caring for, safeguarding, guiding, anointing.))

    And, because your situation is dire to your mission, I want to leave you with this shortcut .

    God (that of perfect Love) is our refuge and strength,
        an ever-present help in trouble
        Psalm 46:1

    Blessed be,

    Alicia
    (just a voice from the wilderness)

    Like

  3. I celebrate you and lend my support and encouragement. Thank you for being a strong voice of inspiration for us all. The patriarchy will go to extremes to try and keep us in what it considers “our place” and yet, to paraphrase the great poet Maya Angelou, still we rise.

    Like

  4. So beautifully written and powerful as well. I am happy there are women like you making a path for repressed women all over the world. I do it as well, just not on such a large forum. Those who try to put us down are really bullies and fearful of women. They do not realize the value of women. I send you blessings on your journey. Diane

    Like

  5. Thank you for sharing with us..me, your path in life. I give you my word that I will support the birthright of love, justice, and light. I support you and want to thank you for popping into my life, always at the right time. You are always welcome to visit and stay with me in Carmel,Ca.
    Jennifer Holmes

    Like

  6. Reblogged this on Cauldron: On Politics, Power and Spirituality and commented:

    When these kinds of attacks happen, the target gets blamed and ridiculed – especially when her work in the world pushes through a certain threshold of awareness.

    But that is – still – a part of the work. Not something to borne, swept under the carpet or ignored. But energy to transmute through conscious, public engagement.

    And in my case, that means communicating a very clear message to my attackers – and the larger energetic dynamics these puppets are dancing to the tune to.

    And that message is simple.

    I´ve only just begun my dance,
    On this world as a stage,
    And in many others.
    As the eyes burn with Soul´s song,
    And the feet trample what must be no longer be borne,
    So too shall the stars, one day, whisper my name.

    In other words – Get out of my way, whilst you still can.
    I´ve only just begun.

    Like

    1. Yes!
      This is the Belt of Truth, the Breastplate of Righteousness, the Shield of Faith, the Helmet of Salvation, and the Sword of the Spirit.

      Like

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