The things that annoy you, that challenge you, that make you feel reactive or uncomfortable, that get you to knuckle down in a deep state of denial – are exactly the things that you have not yet addressed within your own experience and psyche.
When I say you, I mean: I, me, we, us.
It can be about race, culture, beauty, history, politics – anything under the sun. There´s a million different messages and some of them are very likely to push your buttons. Sometimes for damn good reasons.
But there´s a difference between reactivity and an integrated response.
Take the time to pause, reflect and integrate the message that is presented to you before you hit that block or reply button.
Having an opinion doesn´t make you right, or wrong. It just means you have an opinion.
In the face of messages that seem to contradict what you believe, it´s easy to spew hate and try and delegitimize what the other person is saying.
Or to convince yourself that you´re being attacked unfairly – especially when what they´re saying hits home.
But is that really growth?
What do you do when you get ´locked´ into a particular mode of response that blocks any possibility of changing your perception?
Take a step back. Give yourself a little time.
Once you have had that time to think and feel deeply into the message – then act.
When thinking about the message no longer hooks you or baits you into entering dysfunctional energetic dynamics – then you´re good to respond.
You might wish that person well and realize their truth isn´t for you (acknowledging the deeper implications of that action).
Or you might find that you need to widen your perception to accept a truth that requires you to change key aspects of your self-image.
You might realize that your engagement is about as useful as tossing sand into the Sahara, or salt into the sea.
Sometimes people say shit just to get your energy one way or another.
However, that´s a different kettle of fish …
But when you find yourself in a situation where (1) meaningful engagement is possible and (2) you can learn something new – pay attention.
It might just change your life.
Starting with you.
Changing yourself is not easy, especially when you´re holding onto your self-perception for dear life.
But under the right circumstances, it can be that catalyst for change and growth that you have been waiting for.
When presented with a truth that aligns with your soul and not your ego-mind, change – no matter how difficult – is worth it.
When you choose not to react in a way that gets you tangled up in interactions where both do not grow – you transform yourself and others who witness you.
That´s real power.
The choice … is … always yours to make.
So choose wisely.
Post & Text © Bairavee Balasubramaniam, 2018. All rights reserved.
Image: Colourful Landscape © Jean Beaufort. Public Domain.